trapped.

Alone in my room only with an open Chemistry book on the desk as my companion.

Another message from my friend asking me why I did not replied her message last night. Another question from my parents asking me when will be given a semestar break so that we can go to Pulau Redang together.

I am on an emotional roller-coaster ride. I'm up then down. Sometimes I get so high, I'm on cloud nine. Dizzy with excitement and a rush of adrenaline. Later, I fall into what seem like a dark bottomless pit that send me screaming at the top of my lungs. Screaming in despair and hopelessness. Praying for God to help me pull through.

Scared of not doing enough. Of not getting enough. I used to be so carefree. My mind was free.

I was free.

I look at myself in the mirror now and I feel suffocated. I can't run away.